Posts filed under 'Funny Stuff'
In an incident that was quite strange and more than a little weird, a 14-year-old girl in Wisconsin was arrested for refusing to stop sending text messages during class, where she proceeded to hide the phone in her ASS CRACK. According to the Smoking Gun, the unnamed girl apparently ignored the teacher’s requests to stop using her Samsung phone, but she kept on SMSing as she pleased. When the school security officer was called in, the girl claimed she didn’t have a phone. The school finally called in the police, who searched the girl, and found the phone under her pants “in the buttocks area.” The police confiscated her phone and charged her with disorderly conduct. These are your tax dollars at work, Wisconsin. Only in the USA.
February 18th, 2009
The Onion pulls another great story out of it’s creative hat.
George W. Bush, 43rd president of the United States of America, passed away painlessly in his sleep Monday night, White House sources confirmed. The 62-year-old Bush was reportedly discovered lying unresponsive in his bed by first lady Laura Bush, a gentle smile still on his lips. “It was as though he knew it was his time to go,” said longtime family physician Dr. Harold Ditmas, who pronounced the president dead of natural causes at 7:24 a.m. Plans for Bush’s funeral have been postponed indefinitely following an unexpected incident in which the president’s corpse was sucked through an Air Force One jet engine
January 27th, 2009
Here is a new twist on an old appendage! wo men whose company sold a device known as the Whizzinator that helped men cheat on drug tests have pleaded guilty in federal court in Pittsburgh.
George Wills and Robert Catalano each pleaded guilty Monday to two conspiracy counts.
They owned the California-based Internet company Puck Technology.
The Whizzinator is a prosthetic penis that comes with a heating element and fake urine.
U.S. Attorney Mary Beth Buchanan’s office says the goal of it and another device called Number 1 was to help people pass drug tests. The devices were sold from 2005 to 2008.
The California men are scheduled to be sentenced in February and face up to eight years in prison, a half-million-dollar fine or both. I would rename this product as the pee-pee machine.
November 25th, 2008
Doctors in Arizona got a big surprise when looking into a womans brain for a tumor.
Rosemary Alvarez started experiencing numbness in her arm and blurred vision. She went to the emergency room twice and had a cat scan, but everything came up clear, MyFOXPhoenix.com reported.
It wasn’t until doctors took a closer look at an MRI that they discovered something very disturbing.
“Once we saw the MRI we realized this is something not good,” neurosurgeon, Dr. Peter Nakaji told the news station. “It’s something down in her brain stem which is as deep in the brain as you can be.”
Alvarez was wheeled into surgery where Nakaji and his colleagues were expecting to remove a tumor, but they uncovered a worm instead.
On a video of the surgery, Nakaji can be heard chuckling after he made the discovery. All I can say is yuk! That is totally gross.
November 20th, 2008
Check-out this sweet picture that got the secret service all up-in-arms
November 1st, 2008
Here are some weird news shorts:
-Police in Arkansas say they found DNA evidence on a half-eaten candy bar helped them zero in on a robbery suspect. Should have eaten the whole thing, eh?
-A group of up hundreds of enraged young men killed 11 people who were accused of being witches and wizards in western Kenya, in some cases slitting their throats or clubbing them to death before burning their bodies. I guess they have never seen an of the Harry Potter movies.
-In yummy news, a trailer loaded with 14 tons of double-stuffed Oreos has overturned, spilling the cookies still in their plastic sleeves into the median and roadway.
-Only in the Big Apple, a Manhattan restaurant is offering a hamburger that costs $175 and is topped with gold flakes.
May 25th, 2008
A Japanese pin-up model says that her big breasts have not only boosted her career — they also helped her overturn a court verdict. The bikini model, who goes by her professional name Serena Kozakura, was cleared after a court decided she was too well-endowed to squeeze into a room through a hole, as she had been found guilty of earlier.
“I used to hate my body so much,” Kozakura, who has appeared in product commercials on television, told the private Asahi network in an interview aired Tuesday. “But it was my breasts” that won in court, she said.
The case was splashed through the Japanese media on Tuesday, with the Asahi network even inviting her to demonstrate how she could not fit through the opening. Kozakura, 38, was convicted last year of property destruction after a man said she kicked in the wooden door of his room and crawled inside, apparently because he was with another woman.
Kozakura had said the man made the hole himself. In her appeal, the defence counsel held up a plate showing the size of the hole and said that she could not squeeze through with her 110-centimetre (44-inch) bust. “The judges were very good-mannered as they showed no expressions on their faces. I guess they’re well-trained,” Kozakura said. Tokyo High Court presiding judge Kunio Harada agreed and threw out the guilty verdict on Monday, saying there was reasonable doubt over the man’s account. Well that was a nice…story.
March 4th, 2008
A man in Florida was halfway through an order of steamed clams when he bit down on something hard, it was a rare, iridescent purple pearl. George Brock and his wife, Leslie, had been spent the day at the beach Friday in South Florida and stopped at Dave’s Last Resort & Raw Bar for a bite. Their discovery is thought to be valued at $6,000 US or more. The gems are found most frequently in large New England quahogs, clams known for violet coloring on the inside of their shells. The clams in the $10 plate came from Apalachicola in the Florida Panhandle, said restaurant manager Tom Gerry.
January 1st, 2008
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